12 thoughts on “SMELLS LIKE DOG PEE: Finding Hope (and Humor!) in the Ugly”

  1. Wonderful post Luann. The saddest part of this type of behavior is that the people that say hurtful things to others is that it never makes them feel better for the saying of it, it just makes them feel guilty, mean and more awful about themselves. I feel bad that these people feel “less than”, and I wish they could find & feel their own tremendous power.

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    1. You are spot on, Fiona, and it’s the only thing that keeps me from turning into a hurricane of hate back at them. Still, it’s been a very very very hard year, full of incidents like these, and it’s wearing thin. But I’m grateful I can write my way through it, and I’m delighted you liked the results! :^)

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      1. Luann – if you’ve had a hard year and you’ve had a lot of these incidents – ask yourself ‘What am I thinking and feeling about myself to attract these types of incidents?” I know people will think this is all woo woo, but I believe we attract everything to ourselves! (ps and I’m saying this with love and caring)

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  2. And I do enjoy your writing about the craft show event of the 12th The sensitive nose is the Best retort. Rather sorry but glad I missed that pronouncement !!

    Told husband Tom who does work at TJs in rock ridge Oakland that there was a vendors top ten list. He was amused

    Thank you and to keep me in mind about the Artists craft supplies sale idea. I will happily contribute bales of fabric

    Happy Hols SW

    >

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  3. That has got to be one of the rudest comments I have ever heard and I can’t imagine what kind of rancid person says something like that. You handled it with grace. I’m thinking you should have some cards printed for these situations. They could say something like, “Congratulations, you get the award for rudest comment of the day! While I love what I do and generally enjoy the people that I meet at these events, occasionally some mean spirited person comes by to spit out a little venom. Your words will be a story I repeat and repeat and you won’t come out the hero in the telling”. Make them pretty!

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    1. Sharon, thank you for your patience, your comment got lost in the cloud til just now. Which is awful, because it is PERFECT!!!! Thank you so much for commenting, and that card idea is actually perfect, too!

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  4. My mouth fell open at the dog pee remark. What a rude person. You comments about “nibblers” sounded familiar to me. I often find other local makers telling me how successful they are in a) exhibitions b) sales. I say absolutely nothing.

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  5. Fiona Purdy, the hard year came from several deaths in my immediate family, and the situation of needing to find a different studio space in 2019. I didn’t attract that, that’s life.

    The snide comments and cruel actions from people associated with those events, and with this show? It’s easy. The Nibble Theory!

    I am not even a near-perfect human being. But I’m doing the work.

    Whenever I despair, I look at these people and think, “That is exactly who I DON’T want to be, and exactly what I CHOOSE not to do.” Their actions are actually reinforcement that I’m growing.

    The Nibble Theory suggests there are people who, for a lot of reasons, are too afraid or in too much spiritual/emotional/physical pain to grow/expand/go deep. They are envious and intimidated by the gifts of others, who believe if someone else “has” something in the world, there is less for them. They are deeply threatened by those are trying to be a good human. It brings out the worst in them.

    I can’t fix that for them. But I hope, by writing and sharing my experiences, we can all understand the only thing we can do is have compassion–and really, really good boundaries. It’s like forgiveness. It’s not about “letting the jerks off the hook”. It’s about letting OURSELVES off the hook of being connected to the pain they’ve created.

    We have to let go.

    Every time I forget my boundaries, I learn this again. As a dear friend once said, “I love my life lessons! I love them so much I learn them over, and over, and over, and…..!”

    And as Danielle LaPorte said, “Open gentle heart. Big fuckin’ fences.”

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